Soul Mates; The myth that Hollywood sold us

There has been much talk about Soul Mates and Twin Flames and, if I am honest, I have found the definitions confusing. In many cases I find one persons definition contradicts somebody else’s.

Let’s take the term Soul Mate.   The Hollywood movies would have us believe that finding our Soul Mate is the be all and end all in love.  That it’s the happy ever after fairy tale ending.  However, those of us who have had a Soul Mate relationship, especially a romantic one, know how volatile they can be. Definitely, NOT the stuff that fairy tales are made of.

A Soul Mate can be a friend, family member or lover. We have met them in a past life where you both could have assumed different roles, possibly even a different gender. You would have a made a pact with that person to come together again, in the next life term in order to resolves issues and learn lessons. This kind of relationship is not designed to last forever or go the distance. I’m not saying it can’t but that’s not the purpose. 

Soul Mate

A Soul Mate will hold your hand through part of your journey. Your initial connection with this person is immediate. You feel as though you have met before because you have done, at another time in another place. However, these relationships challenge us because they are filled with challenges themselves.

In my own case he would never commit but would always come back to me. We would argue and hurt each other, yet always forgive one another. When together we felt complete.  It was intense but this is the essence of a soul Mate connection. Because it feels like what we think love should feel like and because the connection is so strong we believe it must be our happy ending. With this in mind we try to mould into what a real-life, stereotypical romantic relationship should look like, usually person does this more than the other. This creates more friction and challenge. Why? Well a Soul Mate holds your hand through life and those lessons that you need to learn. Thus when you learn the lesson, you can let go of one another’s hand. It sounds so simple. It probably should be that simple. But those who have loved and left/lost your Soul Mate know that walking away can be heart-wrenching. It’s extremely painful; like part of you has died. In a way it has because that sharing of a soul connection.  Is that the glossy version of Soul Mate that you have been thinking of?  I think not!

Twin Flame
As the name suggests your Twin Flame is your twin, with the connection between you being one that is based on pure love and light.  However, I’m not saying it’s perfect and rosy all the time because every relationship comes with it's own challenges. But the essence of this relationship is pure love.  This is the relationship many of us aspire to and wish for. Some of us find it.  Sadly some of us do not because it is thought that most Twin Flames rarely come together for a love relationship, particularly not in this lifetime.  For me this is a sad thought. To think people do not get to experience something so amazing.  However, due to the fact that more people are seeing light and becoming spiritually aware, we are seeing an increasing number of Twin Flames coming together on the Earth plane.

When working with my guide I asked for further guidance about Twin Flames and Soul Mates.  Here is what I was told:

"What you want is someone who resonates on the same/similar vibrational energy as yourself. This way they understand you, you them. You understand each other. This is what initially happens in a soul Mate energy. You come together on that same vibration. Hence, why the pull is so strong. When healing and releasing need to be done the pull brings you back together (this is when we learn our lesson). However, over time, you find that one is more enlightened than the other. The vibration changes. One is at a higher vibrational level to the other. This is when cords can be cut, so as to release you both to complete the next stage of your journey. That is not to say that you will not be drawn together again. (Here is when I asked Why? My favourite question.) One person may come back to the other. After all, they may still have lessons to learn. By this stage rather than two coming together for mutual healing. One comes in while the other repels them. Not because the love has gone but because they are each on new journeys. The release of the old karma has taken full effect. This is why we have to be careful with cord cutting. It’s not that simple. Not the easy way out. Also it doesn’t always work because we bring you together to learn lessons. You wanted to come back together so you can choose to heal and grow. (I ask Why they say choose!) We can’t force you to do it. You have free will but you will just have to come back again to learn. Attempting to cut cords willy-nilly hampers the process. This natural process."

In essence it seemed to me that what was most important when attracting a romantic partnership is to be with someone who is on your level.  The label of Soul Mate and Twin Flame is irrelevant what matters most is how that person makes you feel and if being in that relationship makes you feel good.